The Reality of My Condition (A Poem by Hazrat Dr. Mir Muhammad Ismael Sahib r.a)
O God—The Magnificent God, the Beneficent God,
Your grace is widespread—O my God.
Your servant is ill-mannered and headed for ruin,
He is of poor character and conduct—O my God.
He is suspicious, ill-tempered, and narrow-minded,
Envious, erratic, and anxious,
Disturbed and lacking all merit,
A source of suffering—O my God.
He is sinful and lacking faith,
A cause of pain—O my God.
He is immature, reckless, and unwise,
Headed for a disgraceful end—O my God.
He is foul-tongued, impure in gaze, a wrongdoer,
Ugly in speech and appearance,
With a nature both suspicious and corrupt—
What a terrible end awaits—O my God.
He is vulgar, foul-spoken, immoral,
Pretending to be compassionate, yet insincere,
With ill intentions, evil actions, and poor behavior—
Intellect, beauty, and talent—he is completely ill-mannered, O my God.
His speech is offensive, his gaze dishonorable,
Even when he acts righteously, it is mere show—O my God.
He is distrustful, full of faults and doubts,
A collection of afflictions—O my God.
Ignorant, unjust, and utterly dishonorable,
Cursed, and his end is doomed—O my God.
He is full of suspicion, ill conduct, bad habits,
Evil thoughts, intentions, and impure looks.
In both outward and inward states, he is flawed—
And yet, he continually lifts his hands to You in prayer.
O God, how strange that despite all this,
He dares to pray to You!
Still, O Most Gracious God,
Grant me the gift You’ve promised—O my God.
Even if this plea is unworthy—O my God.
Can it be that despite my foul stench and vile nature,
Your mercy will not touch me?
Do not deprive even strangers of Your grace—
Then how could someone as filthy as I
Be granted entrance into Paradise?
Now who will protect this sinner but You?
Why were You silent?
Your Guide was faultless,
And was sent for the cure of such sinners.
Now I am trapped in the pit of Hell due to my deeds,
But You’re the One whose name I call—O my God.
O God, You are the Most Merciful and Compassionate,
If I am weak and unable to act,
Still, Your mercy descends—so when it does,
And if my sins are real—
Then You must also call to me,
And silence my tongue with forgiveness.
Now this matter is in Your hands—O my God.
Ameen.